The Return of The Mustang’s WORST Valentine’s Day Pick Up Lines

The Return of The Mustang’s WORST Valentine’s Day Pick Up Lines

Last year, we asked for the absolute worst pick-up lines that people, both students and community members, have either heard or could come up with on their own. Some of them were pretty bad. This year, we asked again and people were more savage than ever.

As with last year, we recommend that you do not try any of these. Also, I feel I should say some of these are pretty explicit, so be warned.


The President of NSLS gave us a classic:

“Are you from Nashville? Because you’re the only Ten-I-see. Actually, I dated someone from Tennessee, and trust me they aren’t tens…” -Dayana Baez


The owner of the Las Cruces Art Gallery Art Obscura also offered a geography-related line:

“So, on a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?” -Deret Roberts


A couple of WNMU Athletes also shared with us:

“Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for.” -Ross White

“Someone please call an Ambulance! An angel just fell from the sky…” -Alejandro Gonzalez-Alvarez


A few ladies shared actual lines they’ve been told:

“I see you walking around town a lot. Let me know if you ever need a ride… *wink*” -Hannah Grey

“One guy I guess got too nervous, because he went up to me and said ‘I think I’m blind!’ then realized his mistake and just tried to act natural.” -Ashlee Nolan

“The worst line I’ve ever heard was ‘I want you to have my child so I can have exclusive rights to you for the rest of my life.’ Yes, that was actually said to me.” -Jennifer Quarrell Shaffer.


There were of course some silly ones:

“Do you believe in love at first sight? No? Wait, I’ll walk by again.” -Cassidy Lewis

“Do you have a band-aid? I skid my knee when I fell for you.” -JoLynn Guerrero

“Are you a soda, girl. Cuz you is ‘Sepsi’.” -Abbey Ramirez


As with last time, things took a dark turn:

“Do you wash your pants with Windex? Because I can see myself in them.” -Kendra Milligan

“Are you an Advil? Because I want to put you in my mouth 4 or 5 times a day.” -Aldo Lopez

“You remind me of my pinkie toe. You’re little and cute and I’m probably gonna bang you on my coffee table tonight.” -Andrew Forbes

“Hi, I’m Carlton Rich. Your eyeliner is perfect and I hate that skinny b— at work. Let’s make-out.” -Carlton Rich

“Do you want to have coffee with me? Editor’s Note: The rest of this line was unfit for publication. -Gayla Rochambeau.

Finally we had the Editor’s youngest brother who should really be looking at colleges instead of coming up with terrible Valentine’s pick-up lines.

“Are you a taxi? I’d like a ride.” -Evan Lowe

Happy Valentine’s Day Everyone! For more pick up lines to not try at home, check out last year’s list by clicking HERE.